Sempadan Alam - Tok Ayah

Assalamua'laikum tok ayah,

Hai..kami datang melawat tok ayah ni...harap tok ayah gembira keberadaan kami ke rumah abadi tok ayah
sembilan belas tahun berlalu berdetik tanpa henti hingga saat ini..
perasaan di hati sungguh terlalu dekat walau sesungguh mana ingin menggambarkan dengan kata-kata.
sungguh dekat dalam meniti usia hingga ke hari ini

bagai tok ayah hidup dalam hati ini
bagai tok ayah memerhati tanpa jemu
bagai tok ayah tersenyum senang (mungkin gusar)
melihat cucuanda di bumi tuhan ini
merentasi hari-hari mendatang tertunggang terbalik
jatuh bangun tersadung terjelepok
waima tok ayah pada logik minda jasad tak terkelihatan
namun tok ayah tetap ada hidup di dalam hati


bisa jadi kita 'bestfriend' menjalin ukhuwah
seperti cucu dan atuk yang lain
rapat dan akrab bagai isi dan kuku
tawa hilai mengisi ruang tamu rumah
meneroka alam bersama berkongsi suka duka
berusrah melengkap ilmu dunia akhirat
menegur yang mana terlebih kurang

kuasa maha pencipta lagi maha penyayang
mahu tok ayah pulang menghadap semula
kali ini di rumah abadi
tanpa penat menghadap segala kesibukan duniawi
tanpa kita berdua bersua berempat mata di alam dunia langsung
berehat buat selamanya di rumah sana
menanti anak cucu cicit mengirim doa
mengirim untaian pahala tanda kasih tak terhingga
tanda ingatan tak putus
walau jasad telah berpisah daripada roh

tunggu disana ya..kami menyusul :)

Selamat Hari Raya tok ayah dan mok(nenek)

note: Al-fatihah kepada allahyarham tok ayah Mohd Lazim Awang Ngah..

1946-1995(Jun)

Ramadhan--jangan pergi boleh?

bismillah.. moga setiap yang membaca satu persatu kata huruf ini dalam keadaan sihat sejahtera hendaknya.
dalam terpelihara iman bersama niat

ramadhan akhirnya bakal pergi juga
berlalu meninggalkan harapan membisik di hati
moga ketemu tahun depan
dalam perasaan berbaur--- sedih pilu sayu mendominasi
haruskah kau pergi juga
encik ramadhan kareem ?

kerana belum rela ingin lepaskan engkau pergi
kerana belum puas bersama dengan engkau dalam dakapan
kerana banyak malah terlalu ingin diisi bersama kau
kerana sungguh cinta aku akan kau

masih belum puas berasmara memburu rahmat tuhan
masih belum puas menangisi keinsafan pada tuhan
bertemankan engkau ramadhan
mengorak seribu langkah beribadah
tanpa jemu di dada

belum pasti dan tepat apa masih bisa kita bersua lagi
belum pasti
belum

syawal mengintai menampakkan diri
engkau pula bakal melabuhkan tirai
sebak di dada hanya tuhan yang tahu
betapa aku akan merindui engkau

betapa aku cemburu membuak di hati
ramai antara mereka menghadap tuhan yang satu bersama engkau ramadhan
indahnya kembali pada sang pencipta di bulan paling mulia
tiada azab dan masuk pada mana2 pintu jannah
saat indah tak terbayangkan


waima, hidup perlu dikemudi
menongkah arus di bumi sementara
selagi hayat dikandung badan
selagi belum mendapat 'call' daripada tuhan

mahu syahid di bulan barakah
bisik hati memujuk rindu pada tuhan
namun terkesima pabila dosa bergunung
malu teramat untuk bertemu Dia
apa diri layak?

semoga kita berjumpa lagi encik ramadhan

I'll be missing you!

Running Nineteen

assalamua'laikum and hello people!

this year of 2014 is far different compare to last year which i have really too much free time
***grateful**
well.. and more meaningful is i have the opportunity to go through being nineteen-year-old girl in my hometown and have mybfffff (mother) to be by my side..
how realizing it is!

indeed, i have nothing to ask for the presents or gifts
the most important is i have people that i love so much around me
that's it

all of all i am so thankful
seriously..

if need to be mentioned all the deeds for all my living in this world since nineteen years old
that mybffff needs to sacrifice and showers her love, cuddle me, persuading, hugging
damn, so many!

never can be repaid
even with the pile of golds and diamonds

in conjunction of being nineteen.. i want to thank you mother
for giving birth to me..
sobs
(ok..chill)
if compare the things that i have now..
indeed i have nothing in terms of love,education, knowledge, money to support my cost since be born all this while..you always be there for me..
she's my honey sweetheart boom boom no matter what even after we had a 'war' mhehehe

maturity is functioning ---- that's what im trying to say

"what  am i going to achieve? is it enough this amount? (which absolutely a big NO) How about with my deeds? (too little in the eyes of Allah)"

(creepy)

in being nineteen... the last year of 'first' series..
better than late
***sorry for my scatter head**
ok..cool dear self..get yourself be synchronized and well planned..
and please don't feel so sad to be nineteen
it's just a number
lol

in short, let US together reflect back and find some moment being lonely
you know..just ourselves and the god
think..think..and think..

better than late and Allah is never forgetting us...but we sometimes ?

nahh think !

happy nineteen to me

alhamdulillah.

have a nice day y'all!

Cinta tak keterhinggaan ~ MH17 in memory

Bersabar wahai hati
bersabar menyapa ujian ini
tanda kasih dari ilahi
mencekal lagi hati
memuncak pahala buat akhirat nanti
penghapus dosa tak terperi

"la tahzan...jangan bersedih...innalllaha ma'na...Allah sentiasa bersama..."

kuat semangat
tabah cekal wahai diri
teruskan melangkah di hari muka
kebalkan tekad di hati

hanya tuhan sahaja yang tahu
betapa jujurnya cinta kita
walaupun berbeza diri kita
cinta ini milik kita

tinggallah segala kenangan mengabdi di bumi ini
berlinangan air mata
takkan pernah kembali
masih dekat hati

kini tuhan sayangkan diri kau
pergilah
bersemadilah
tenanglah di alam sana
diri rela berteman pasrah

tangisan bersendu beriringan kalamullah
menemani engkau disana
tenanglah disana
kerana tuhan pernah berkata

"setiap yang bernyawa pasti merasai mati"

siapalah aku hambaNya untuk menentang kehendakNya...
menyejuk jauh di lubuk qalbu

moga engkau dikalangan mereka yang beriman dan beramal soleh
diantara yang terlepas azab seksaNya
sempena bulan sungguh mulia

dan...tunggu aku disana ya
kita akan bersua kembali

jaga diri di rumah abadi sana.

wassalam.

note: takziah buat ahli keluarga penumpang & anak kapal MH17.. terima dengan lapang dada...gagahkan semangat untuk teruskan kehidupan yang masih bersisa di bumi sementara...

Anger and Ego --- please be TAME!

we human are full of emotions right?



**ehem***



if that humble uncle was my father

i perhaps might strongly defending him

it's such like the woman was taking advantage over the humble uncle

with the full of anger and dissatisfaction

in the hot and hustle and bustle city 

what i saw..nothing serious happened to that NEW PEUGEOT

but obviously the old man's car

like seriously



the car nevertheless was not catch my attention at all

it's the attitude of old retired man do catch my eyes!

subhanallah...

how really humble and kind- hearted people he was

although he is a Chinese man

no exaggerate intended

let the video speaks itself



whilst that woman with anger and 'bengang'

hope she can TAME her anger and ego even wisely after this

personally, i am literally 'terkena tempiasnya'

due to that her action which i suppose she did not mean of it

just maybe the lady was so sensitive and has problems

(trying to put me in her shoe)



the person that typing this is also undergo and still having control of her emotion



in the Quran itself has told that syaitans were tied during this holy month

so when WE keeps doing the bad and cruel things....

who's the REAL of syaitan is?



muhasabah dear self



(sincere smile)



take care.

Rindu--- betul!

Rindu pada bumi Kota Bharu
rindu yang obses
rindu pada penduduknya

***tarik nafas**

entah bila masa yang tepat dapat bersua semula
mengerat menjalin tautan kasih
hanya doa dikirim bersama angin rindu

tak dikira rindu pada bumi pulau mutiara
Pulau Pinang indah di utara
betapa tuhan saja tahu rindu di dada
ada rezeki jumpalah kita

***ahhh that kind of belonging and too much of missing***

tuhan..bawa kami bersua berempat mata
mengukuh tali silaturahim
biar langsung tiada pertalian darah
mengimarah jalinan terbina lama tak terkira

terlalu indah

alhamdulillah Allah.

note: there's sometimes we feel so missing damn so much like crazy of whoever (especially those who are very dear to us)...the realization occurs somehow when that kind of feeling we tell and ask from the Almighty Allah s.w.t

adioss!

Just July

Salamu'alaikum ya July!

i just wanna say that..
ermmm..nothing but i love you!
hihihi

***silly**

seriously i madly in love with you
you know?
so long i've been kept silently deep in this heart
you know?
you must wondering what is all about that made me loved you
right?

kind of belonging of you
ohh my July!

i'm begging you to be kind and please to me
and make my day for this time
ok?

just july in a modesty.

note: 23rd July i am nervous to meet you this time....