Sunday, 14 January 2018

Don't cry

Please... dear self but without I realized tears came out. Oh shame. While I hugged tightly Kak Jah my dear neighbor who is a Moroccan happily married to her husband that is of course a Malaysian. They have two beautiful and charming princes and they truly shine bright my life just like the moon and stars in the sky. 

Two years they been living the next door. We laughed, we cherished, we cared and love each other like family. The little kids, they are close to me and my parents. Salman, the eldest one is such a chatter box who loves to come to the house whenever he sees that my house door is opened and would call either me or my mom. 

"aunty...aunty!!!" Shouted him cheekily over the fence from his house and sometimes he would come over and stand in front of the door, refuses to go inside.

"Yes my dear Salman honey.." Replied my mom happily.

"Is Kakak (sister) home?" Asked him while eyes searching for me.

Now that he has became a big brother to Sufyan 'donut habiby', who just turned one year and three months old. Trust me, he is a super duper cute especially when smiling :)
Well,they went back to Morroco about six months ago and I missed them damn so much and always consistently ask when to be back here. Once Kak Jah and the kids were back, I learned that they are going to move from the house to be with the husband who is now working at the heart of Kuala Lumpur. So she has no choice but to come along with the kids. 

So the time has arrived, they moved out today officially. We helped them to put the things in the lorry and wave a goodbye for the last time. I tell myself not to cry but I failed. I hold it but damn, my eyes betrayed me by producing the tears like waterfall nonstop. Meanwhile, when Kak Jah saw my teary eyes, she became affected too. And I  hugged her tightly and all those good memories flashing in my mind. The moment when I baked chocolate cake, I will give some to her, macaroni, nasi dagang (her most favorite), brought the kids to the playground, feed them and played joyfully with them. 

 "You are such my dear younger sister and the kids are such your little brothers. You love them so much I know that...but I have to move for good. Do come to our new house okay?" Convinced Kak Jah calmly. 

"InshaAllah..take care and I will miss you so much." I said and tears keep streaming down my face. Sobs. 

"You are such a good neighbor, you help to take care my kids so dearly, it must hard to get such a good neighbor like this in my new place." Utter Kak Jah that is  fluent to speak in Malay.

"God will find a good one over there." I smiled.

"But it will never be the same. When I was leaving to here, my heart felt so heavy to leave my mother in Morroco but i have no choice. This is life."

I understand.

We then hugged for the last time before they off. Literally, from now on things will never be the same anymore. No more the sounds of little Salman and Sufyan my habibies, to hear them cry, laugh, the wittiness and yell. May them always be showered by His blessing and protection wherever they are. In my heart, do I will always carry the good old time memories of us. The photos and videos that I recorded to look back when I feel missing them. I love you all 

fillah, for the sake of Allah.


P/s: Those memories that will remain in my mind :)

Monday, 4 December 2017

Advice for myself

would be

"Take care of yourself." 

Whilst the mind was not focusing of what had said. Again U called, "Hey.." and gesture to my earphone.

Quickly I turned off the music I played on You Tube. With bare expression I looked at him

"Look at me. Take care of yourself." 

And till now I am hanging in there for accomplishing a degree in new media communication here in this certain university 

Hang in there dear self,
there are lot of obstacles to go through further
just hang in there

cause from now on you have to take care of yourself

dear self.

Wednesday, 29 November 2017

Spread Kindness

Good morning world!

As i am writing this, i am in the bus heading to class in Kubang Gajah. Today, i push myself to have liltle bit change from previous day which i need to study at least one subtopic from this certain subject.

From few months ago, we all are so pack and occupied with tasks and assignments be it for individually or group. This semester, we all have to put effort much on exploring new things specially those who is a newbie in 'digesting' Adobe Illustrator and Photoshop. Even up till now final exam is around the corner, still messed up to finish all the haven't done yet -assignments.


That is the screaming inside of me that is struggling to get close and fall in love with Ai and Photoshop. Truth be told,the struggle is real when you have no basic knowledge at all. Though you watched so many times the tutorial from Prof.YouTube.

To be make it short, my darling 'brothers' from Uno Gang have really help me a lot. When I ask a favor for the I even can't remember of the time but one of my brother from another mother said

" I will not feed you fish but I will teach you how to fish the fish." -Nasr

A very good brother. See the way he thinks? Brilliant. Means, he wants me to learn in the good way, so the knowledge will stay longer within me. Understood.

Meanwhile, my another brother from another womb, U is not exceptional in lending his hand for me. This helpful one even sacrifices the sleep and time for making what I plan go as planned. I'm touched honestly. That's why being the only child in the family had always makes me wanna have brothers especially where we would always share the laugh and tears to each other, be partner in crime and get good together back and achieve success together. Okay enough, that cannot be happened it's been destined and I have to believe this is the best. Trust me, though it uttered " you are like my real sister or brother." That feeling would never ever be the same instead how many times we expressed the love towards our foster siblings. All in all, to maintain the friendship and spend the quality moment with them all. Still, I am blessed to meet and know these inspirational people alhamdulillah.

By the way,if you guys happened to read this, thank you from the bottom of my heart.I just hope these kind of people will always be blessed and protected and showered by His blessing for any good deeds done by them and

Let it always be sparkling


Thank you. Yes you.

Sunday, 19 November 2017

Stress, Let's Break Up.

It has been five minutes before I begin to write this sentence. Lots of pending ramblings I would love to pour here but, some how it stuck here in - the mind.

Okay chill. Breathe.

There is so enormous things scatter all inside this brain indeed. Mostly regarding the so-called word of assignments which haven't settled yet. One after another and another and list goes on and on and on..,


It is not a life if there is no trouble or test or such roller coaster road where we would have an ups and down. One thing that U had told me last night,

La yukallifulllahu nafsan illa wus'aha 
Allah will not burden any of human being with more than he is well able to bear
Al Baqarah:286

Point is, whatever the past that had we endured whether it were hurting deep inside and things like that, just let it be as the reason or hikmah (good reason) for us to be what we are right now. 
The past let it be the past, but steer the focus on the future cause we are heading forward not backward. It is ourselves to make the choice, it is our ourselves and our responsibility to create our own story to attain happiness. 

So why so stress?

Take a chill pill, relax.


Under pressure? Take a break in a while.

Tuesday, 14 November 2017

Hurtful Promise.

Hey, I promise no one is going to hurt you. Promise.”

I reply silent.The gaze was at me waiting for any feedback from my side. 
Empty inside, lost. Cause the one who utter that promise, is the one who hurt me the most.
Seriously it’s hurt.Though was about small tiniest matter
Yet the sensitive side of me was so overly sensitive to be true today.
Shame on me.
No. Shame on my heart.

That is so fragile.

Friday, 3 November 2017

Salah Dan Faham Dan Salah

Salah faham 
meremukkan tali persahabatan
tiada niat tidak puas hati terzahir sungguh
salah faham 
nyah kau dari sini
hanya kerana kau 
tercetus kata perbalahan
juga kerana kau-salah faham

demiMu tuhan
aku terkedu

batu salah faham

Wednesday, 1 November 2017

I almost..

Gave up! Seriously with joining this so-called Modern Bride Show in conjunction of convocation festival in my university.

At first, it seems okay Janns and Sophia but Janns be like 50-50. Since Janns knows how to do make up, I must persuade her no matter what.

Few weeks later, I bumped into Janns and asked if she agreed and serious to join this competition. Insufficient make up tools is okay, we can buy.

"You going to participate right?"

"No I don't want to."

Fine. You just get lost out of my sight. Okay that I just utter in my heart.

"Uhuh OKAY NEVER MIND!" Dissapointedly I replied.

And there it goes on and on I feel like giving up. Though this is the best plan from God to me. Maybe He just wants me to concentrate with theater since the date for both bridal show and theater would be on the same day but on different time.

Then, my fingers swiftly Whatsapp Palie, my virtual friend who is a photographer asking if he know any makeup artist here in Perthlis or Northern region. Make it short, Reiymei come to the rescue all the way from Kedah.

I swear the process in getting this makeup artist (MUA) to come join this Modern Bride Show was so with ease and smooth alhamdulillah.  Though, at first, we had misunderstanding where he thought he needs to bring his own model which is NOOoo! Alright, chill Moon...get this MUA clear with detailed information.

"Nononono, you have no need to bring any model with you cause what..I am the model and you as the MUA and Sophia as assistant MUA."

"Okay got it but I have one issue here. I don't have transport cause I'm taking train from my place to there. You need to fetch me or else I might get lost to Siam (Thailand) by train"

"Right, I will fetch you from train station in Arau, no worries."

"One thing, how about the registration fees?"

"That, it's on me okay so now deal you are coming to my university?"

"Sure I will come to this bubbly's girl university."

*red face*

On the day, I and Sophia hopped on MyBus to fetch him and even earlier I said to this MUA Reiymei that we are going to fetch him by MyBus not YourBus hahaha!

"I have no problem at all."Thank god...

Then, I and Sophia arrived earlier and we had a late breakfast near the KTM Arau while waiting for his arrival.

"I had arrived, but theres one friend coming with me."

"Okay wait at the front of KTM entrance I come to you now. May I know what do you like to have for lunch? And drink?"

"Chicken rice and iced coffee please.."

Done with lunch, we straight away heading to university main campus where the competition is going to be held. Meanwhile I overheard Reiymei told his friend, Hisyam to make up me with one this particular style. I was like don't you make my face look like dracula mannnnn.

Chill...breathe in...breathe out. With Sophia argued to take Uber not MyBus to our university in Pauh. I then agreed.

The procees in dressing up and making up me went well and smoothly. This talented MUA Reiymei to be honest has a specialty in special effect make up even has ten years of experience in doing this thing. He even owns and runs his own production house calle Red Chillies Production.

"Why red?" I asked spontaneously.
"Cause I love red." He said confidently with a light smile on his lip.

" you know what you are the one and only outsider to come here. The rest are students."

He seems pretty shocked with my words. So we set the target we could win this competition.We were given an hour to getting ready and everything and he did his job so efficiently amagaddd even Sophia was there keep observing and adore how this MUA works.

It was also my first time asked to wear that artificial eyelashes. How it felt? Freaking heavy and uncomfortable at first but I get used to it.

"You never had wear this stuff right?"

"That's true."

"Nevermind, it's normal to feel uncomfortable but gradually would be alright. Okay open your eyes slowly.."

Suddenly, Dr Mai came in to the make up room and approached me.
"Oh it's you Munirah I almost didn't recognize you! Wow, you can get married after this."

Sure, just pass me a tall, fair and handsome man and I will say "I do" now. She burst into laugh and wide smile.

Done with make up, it's time to cat walk on the stage in front of the judges. My over long and narrow dark blue mermaid dress was like stucked while I getting ready to climb the stage's stairs.

"Please don't get stumble on the stage please dont get stumble it will be shame in front of these people please." I speak to myself with heart thumping like crazy frog.

So what I do was hold a bit the lower part of the dress while do the walk on stage where all eyes were watching at me presenting the bridal dress. Whatever.

I noticed Reiymei,Kimi and Sophia were watching from the seat in front of stage. I just smiled to cover my nervous and the emcees is now going to announce the winnerrrrr!

Dup dap dup dap

We won as the first runner-up

I know what was the lacking -the walk on stage.

As for me, is better to win second place rather than stumbled on the stage and I don't know where to hide my face.

I ramble a lot tonight, but before I pen off let's see the artwork done by Reiymei okay? Okay.

In short, never give up even until last minute. We do planning, Allah is also planning but His plan is the best. Thank you so much to Reiymei for having me and make this to reality and Sophia too! I love you guys :)

That feeling of almost giving up tho

The marvelous stupendous gorgeous effect

Be optimistic for everything

Mystery Transformation

My friend were shocked to see this photo thinking I got married. Nah im not okay.
I look like an opera woman amagad


Bride and talented MUA Reiymei

One team


Can I go wander in your heart?

Yasss we did it!